Tuesday, December 1, 2009


Recently I went on a road trip with some girlfriends to visit their family, hang out, and most importantly, go see a college football rivalry game. If I'm being completely honest, I don't care in the least bit for football. I don't like to play it, watch it, understand it, and I can't pay attention to whats going on for more than a minute. And while I'm being honest, the only reason I enjoy going is to say I went, and partake of the incredibly over priced artery-clogging food they have to offer there. Sad? Yes. Un-American? Probably.

My friends and I were making small talk trying to kill time until the game started, getting comfortable, snapping a few pictures-being girls. We had joked about hoping some hot guys would sit next to us and laughed about it. Well right as the game was starting, a college age guy came and stood next to me, and smiled real big. Another honest confession-meeting guys in situations like that is my least favorite thing in the world. I'm shy, uncomfortable, and am in no way able to act like my usual self. I get embarrassed. So I was horrified when he started screaming and slapping me high fives every time anything exciting happened, which was apparently all the time. The crowds were noisy, so when he repeatedly tried to talk to me, I had absolutely no idea what he was saying. Which made things more awkward. Little did I know that the noise had nothing to do with his incoherent ramblings-he was drunk as a dog and slurring so badly that he didn't even know what he was saying. All the sudden I heard yelling and looked to my left where he had been standing right beside me. He had fallen down to the next level on the guy in front of him, laying in the mans seat while the victim was trying to peel himself off the guy in front of him. Ridiculous. So, we found different seats.

Of course our luck would be that pretty much the entire stadium was completely plastered, so no seats were safe. The guys sitting in front of us were interesting enough. Once again it was high fives all around whenever anything good happened. Apparently my reactions were not satisfactory to one of the guys so he made it into a little game that he would give all the other girls high fives and then look at me and turn away. Well good. I was completely high fived out, and was actually looking forward to just watching the game uninterrupted. 

But that wasn't going to happen. The guy sitting in front of me said he would give me a sticker if I would act more excited. "Anything to shut you up" was what I was thinking; besides, the sticker he had was pretty hilarious so I actually did want it. "Ok, I will". So he peeled the sticker from his shirt and as I reached for it, he put it right on my boobs and started rubbing his hands all over it to "get it to stick". So I pushed his hands off and said "that's OK, I can do it", but it took him a while to get the point. In the meantime he just kept putting his hands all over me until I pushed him hard enough that it threw him off balance and he desisted. Annoying.

The game was almost over and we were all kind of tired and discouraged because "our" (their) team wasn't doing so hot. One of my girlfriends Eva was sitting next to a guy she knew through a mutual friend (who seemed very nice and chatty) and they were talking on and off throughout the game. For the second time that day I heard yelling, only I looked to my left this time. A man sitting behind Eva had fallen onto our level, knocking the nice sober guy sitting next to her into the man in front of him. I was completely paranoid for the rest of the game that that same situation would happen to me, only I'd fall far enough to meet my death, landing in some guys keg of beer.

  Amazingly enough there were a few other awkward moments, but I won't bore you with those for now. But the good news is, the game finally ended and our team won. What a weekend.

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